Written by: Rick Staggenborg, MD on Oct 28, 2009 7:28 AM PDT
This chapter is dedicated to my loving, wise and long-suffering mother. May God grant her soul the peace she never knew in this life.
I recently saw a cartoon in The Funny Times illustrating what life would be like without woman. It depicted two guys sitting in lawn chairs in a tropical paradise, drinking beer and watching sports on TV with pizza boxes spread all around them. I wish I could remember the caption, but the picture itself left an indelible image on my mind and reinforced my idea of the misplaced priorities of too many men.
Of course the idea was ridiculous, since if there were only two men they would be at war with each other if history is any guide. They would have to be immortal to ever sit down together between fights. Even then, they would probably be fighting over the remote control while watching their fellow men simulate battle on the gridiron. More fundamentally, such a society would not be the happy one depicted in the scene.
Of course the idea was ridiculous, since if there were only two men they would be at war with each other if history is any guide. They would have to be immortal to ever sit down together between fights. Even then, they would probably be fighting over the remote control while watching their fellow men simulate battle on the gridiron. More fundamentally, such a society would not be the happy one depicted in the scene.
I cannot imagine existence would have a point without women. What would be the motivation of men in such a world to invent TV, beer, football and pizza? If men did not have the love and comfort of women and the joy of raising children together, life would not be worth living. On the other hand, perhaps in the absence of competition for the most desirable mates there would be no purpose in war either. Work and material things would hold no interest for me without children and a family to share them with.
A life of hedonism, especially without women, strikes me as a good description of Hell. Siddhartha was born into wealth and luxury and soon realized this as a young man. This was his motivation to dedicate his life to understanding its purpose and becoming Buddha, the enlightened one.
A life of hedonism, especially without women, strikes me as a good description of Hell. Siddhartha was born into wealth and luxury and soon realized this as a young man. This was his motivation to dedicate his life to understanding its purpose and becoming Buddha, the enlightened one.
Woman in all her variety is the spice of life that gives it its wonderfully complex and delicious flavor to men. Even most gay men enjoy the company of women, unless their minds have been perverted by the anger and abuse of an unhappy woman with power over them in childhood.
In America, women grow up in a world in which their ability to bestow physical pleasure on a man is coveted. This is their gift and theirs alone to both give and receive. It is also their curse because the covetousness, anger and at times psychopathy of men is the source of most of the pain women endure. This pain is most hurtful when it is experienced at the hands of their own fathers.
In America, women grow up in a world in which their ability to bestow physical pleasure on a man is coveted. This is their gift and theirs alone to both give and receive. It is also their curse because the covetousness, anger and at times psychopathy of men is the source of most of the pain women endure. This pain is most hurtful when it is experienced at the hands of their own fathers.
To be sexually abused in childhood is to experience potential soul death, even when the father loves the child. In this case his betrayal of their special relationship can be even more devastating, creating conflicts in the identity of the child at a critical stage of her development whenever it occurs. Such a betrayal is usually driven by desperate loneliness, even when the father has a loving wife.
Sexual abuse is also the result of ignorance on the part of the father who fails to understand the importance of his role in nurturing his daughter’s development. The daughter's love of the father perpetuates his ignorance and her pain, as she will most often suffer in silence to please him and out of shame or fear of consequences to both of them. More often than not she lives with pain and self-doubt until later in life. Only then if at all does the average woman risk re-experiencing her shame by telling a counselor or an especially trusted friend about the unspeakable acts she has endured.
Sexual abuse is also the result of ignorance on the part of the father who fails to understand the importance of his role in nurturing his daughter’s development. The daughter's love of the father perpetuates his ignorance and her pain, as she will most often suffer in silence to please him and out of shame or fear of consequences to both of them. More often than not she lives with pain and self-doubt until later in life. Only then if at all does the average woman risk re-experiencing her shame by telling a counselor or an especially trusted friend about the unspeakable acts she has endured.
It saddens me to think of the suffering of our women at the hands of men who fail to appreciate the gift of God in creating woman. Women bear the pain of childbirth willingly in order to experience the love of their children and the strengthening of the bond between husband and wife. Children are our only hope for a future worth striving toward. Giving them the future that they deserve is our burden. We will be rewarded in the end if we remain motivated by our love for the most defenseless among us.
How sad that many men do not respect themselves enough to value their role in the perpetuation and advancement of our species. These lonely, unfulfilled and often angry men suffer their own Hell of a purposeless existence. As for myself, I never forget to be grateful for this gift, the miracle of sexual dimorphism and of life itself.
How sad that many men do not respect themselves enough to value their role in the perpetuation and advancement of our species. These lonely, unfulfilled and often angry men suffer their own Hell of a purposeless existence. As for myself, I never forget to be grateful for this gift, the miracle of sexual dimorphism and of life itself.
In the immortal words of George Harrison:
Something in the way she moves
attracts me like no other lover.
Something in the way she woos me...
I don't want to leave her now.
You know I believe her now
Somewhere in her smile she knows
that I don't need no other lover.
Something in her style that shows me,
Don't want to leave her now.
You know I believe her now.
You're asking me will my love grow.
I don't know, I don't know.
You stick around now it may show.
I don't know, I don't know
Something in the way she knows
and all I have to do is think of her.
Something in the things she shows me,
Don't want to leave her now.
You know I believe her now.
Rick Staggenborg, MD
Coos Bay, OR
I had considered using I am Woman for the lead in video of this essay but thought it too dated. However, since it was my mother's favorite song, here it is:
